Last night this noise roared by
Loud as thunder, crashing through
The endless sky, and landed
With a thud to shake the earth.
In silent, settling dust I shook
My head, and wondered,
"What the hell was that?!"
A thin blue man looked at me and said:
"Sounded like a piece of your life
"Just fell out."
Born in a roadside coffeehouse
Full of dust and cobwebbed smoke
Wishing for a taste of wind and wild --
I was a packaged flower, wrapped in tin,
Sold door-to-door by ringmen for hard cash:
Sold once for gold, once for silver,
Once for lead, and once for naught,
And once for the price of a good, hard blow.
Dreaming of bowers, woods and wilds,
Sleeping in a stupor far from home.
Stars rise in the wilderness--
This flower walks in darkness,
Coming home
Most weasels don't have hands
But I met one that did, long ago
He was long and sleek, mink-brown body
Slinking through sunlight into shade
('Cause in the shadows, no one sees your face).
Black obsidian eyes could cut just like a knife,
Peer into private places in the mind
And pry away quiet protections
You made me dirty, weasel,
By sliding where you were not welcome
Smearing my pearls with mud,
Ripping into my roses,
You didn't even wipe away the blood you left behind--
You just laughed
But not a laugh at what you saw of me
Because you didn't see.
Muddy footprints on white snow
You pissed your name across my breast
So hot it burned into my heart
I didn't know weasels played with thermite flames
You made me hurt, weasel,
By trampling on my garden,
Slipping unnoticed into uneasy pockets
Of light and shade, and stole away my life
To make your own tale
No one told me Weasel was a story-teller.
Folks set traps for weasels
Those slender chicken-thieves made into miniver
But no one trapped you, weasel
So swift and sly, silent as a fox,
You stole all that you could and slipped away
And all the traps were left for me to trip
No one stopped you, weasel,
And no one knew your crimes
"We couldn't catch the weasel," they said to me,
"So we'll just capture you instead."
And so they did
And weasel got away.
There is no room for me in your house
Not even should I shrink
Smaller than a mouse
No place for me at hearth or hall,
There is no place for me at all,
No flickering firelight space
Nor gift of food and drink--
Your house is much to small
To give me room.
There is no room for me in your bed,
Neither at your foot
Nor at your head
No place for me within your bower,
Not even at the midnight hour
When nighttime is most dark
And even the stars are lost in space--
In darkness, then, I cower
For you have no room.
A bottle meant for pleasure
Is now consumed for pain,
For nothing dulls the stillness
Quite like demon rum--
And no one knows what I've become.
Drunk, say you? How could you know?
How could you save me from the blow
Of dark despair?
How could you care?
How could you know my heart's delight
(Those childhood dreams)
Were scattered, lost to lonely night
Long ago -- how could you know?
Pick up the pieces left behind;
The pieces of my mind
That no one wanted. Pieces for sale,
At any price, I'll sell
My piece of mind
Just for some peace of mind --
I'll sell a piece at any price
Just to have peace at any price.
Just name it -- rubies, diamonds, tin,
Something the cat dragged in,
My body, my brain, my heart my soul,
Sell something for a scrap of life...
Still no one understands.
This song is growing old,
Day by day, the chords all die,
Yet I keep singing the same dead tune
To tone-deaf hearts that never hear.
You'd think that I would disappear
From being nothing, year after year,
But maybe someone will hear me soon--
Listen to my anguished cry--
Come and watch my corpse grow cold.
Would they light fires in my name?
Consume a barge in funereal flame?
Or let balloons go in the rain?
No, I think they'd wander off
In whispers, speaking low,
Of what they used to know of me,
Which wasn't much, and isn't it sad,
Someone so young, who had so much--
And then they'd pause, and talk about the news,
And politics, and weather, and such.
Tick, tick, says the clock, and bids me watch
The flakes of life fall away,
First my body, then my hair,
Then life itself will go someday--
Someday soon, or so they say.
Something in me watches my life slip away:
Eyes peering into time, eternal night,
Seeing the child I never was,
And ever shall become, and so say I:
I shall be that child until I die.
Hoping for a promise never made,
I hope until my grave.
Wishing is vain,
I dream of tasting feelings--
Gut-level loving so desperately craved
But never won. I fought so hard,
It made me ill to choke on all the pain,
All that screaming no one heard
Means just one thing:
Death to me,
No one hearing seems a fruitless plan
But no one hears, no one ever hears
What I cannot give up -- someone must hear!!
Does anybody care whether I die?
Or am I even here? Or do I matter?
Matter or energy -- I have neither one;
I break the laws of physics
When people look through me.
And there, despite the grace of God, go I.
My child, you're learning how to walk--
Just a babe, you're learning how to talk
Sweet innocence, I had you, you are mine
Make Mother happy, make her smile--
That's your job, you know.
Walk across this broken glass for me
But don't dare hurt your feet!
I knew you'd screw it up--
Why can't you do anything right?
Carry the burdens of my soul for me
And never speak a word of pain--
Make Mother whole again, make her feel happy.
Now what, what's your problem?
What are you crying for? Cut that noise!
You're just making trouble, that's all.
Here, have my sorrows, take them from me,
But don't be sad yourself--
Don't forget to keep on smiling!
Mother loves her baby when she keeps a cheery face
So wipe off that frown --
You've got nothing to be sad about, anyway.
Give me all your love, for it will heal me
And maybe I'll love you, too,
If you're a good girl and keep on giving--
Otherwise I might run out of love.
Hey -- what are you doing with that boy?
You can't love anyone but me -- I'm the Mother!
You ought to be ashamed of yourself,
You don't deserve any love at all!
Just remember, after all I've done to you,
That no one loves you quite like Mother does...